(804) 928-3189 BethHedquist@gmail.com

The Messiness of New Birth

The Messiness of New Birth

Don’t you hate those perfect Christmas letters, the ones enclosed in the perfect christmas card,  bragging about their children’s accomplishments, awards, and extracurricular activities, the fabulous trips they have taken over the year, and all the wonderful things they are grateful for?


Nothing ever seems to go wrong in those families!



I never could write those letters. My life has never been a run-of-the-mill, mainstream vanilla race to keep up with the Jones’. And I never wanted to pretend it was. Because each year for me has always brought a mix of joy and sorrow, success and failure, comedy and tragedy. And this year has been no different.


I have had mountaintop highs and dark valley lows. I’ve laughed myself silly, gasped in wonder at the beauty of this world, been humbled by the presence of Spirit in my life, and felt my heart open in compassion and communion with another. I’ve also cried and raged and struggled with fear, disappointment, shame, doubt and despair.


With Christmas right around the corner, I have been feeling a new aspect of myself that is trying to be born. I don’t know what she’ll look like, or what she’ll ask of me, or even how I’ll know when she’s arrived. I certainly know that with any birth there are labor pains, and I have been feeling them for quite awhile now.


So my celebration of the holiday has been simple this year, letting go of achieving the picture perfect Christmas, and spending time in silence contemplating the light. That beautiful, unique light that we each carry inside. The light of the Christ consciousness that the world urgently needs right now.


Have you been feeling it too? Is something stirring in you that is aching to be brought forth?


Possibly you sense something that is longing to be released, something that is obstructing your light?


The act of giving birth is a messy thing. Whether in a stable, in a hospital, or in the everyday unfolding of your life, it usually isn’t neatly packaged with bows and ribbons, awards and accolades and accomplishments. It can be painful and frightening and full of twists and turns. It requires your naked vulnerability, some serious effort, and a lot of breathing and surrendering to the forces within.


And yet it’s the most meaningful mystery of life we came to this earth to express. Not to be overly religious, but have you considered that the light within you is your savior, as well as the savior of the world? Not in the sense of someone or something that you must bow down and submit to, but as your real self, your divine essence, the beautiful gift that you are?


That light comes into this world as a child. That child often comes crying, kicking and screaming, or possibly holding it’s breath, yet it is that child that can change the world. Welcome him. Hold her. Nurture her. Give him space to fully express himself, to grow and develop and explore. Let her lead the way. She knows.


Your inner child is the light of the world. Not perfect, not fully mature, not born of royalty according to the world’s standards, but the divine light that we have been waiting for.


My wish for you this Christmas is that you fully embrace the messiness and imperfection and discomfort that accompanies new birth, and celebrate the gifts your inner child has come to bring.


Merry Christmas!


If you haven’t already, I invite you to sign up to hear from me, and receive my workbook, Treasure in The Depths: The Hidden Obstacles to Fulfillment. It’s my gift to you!



  1. I feel deeply that God is an action and a decision in our minds and hearts to forgive and to Love.
    May this Christmas be fulfilled with God and the Fruits of the Spirit within and shared generously with all around us and beyond in peace and harmony centered in the Lord.

    • Beautiful, Carolina! Merry Christmas to you, a Christmas filled with Love, Peace, Forgiveness and Harmony!

  2. Yes! I feel something is being born in me as well. This is such a rich time of year for me and the archetypal story of the journey of Joseph and Mary speaks to me deeply now as I make this physical transition to El Paso. Thanks, Beth, for this post

    • Your welcome, Pauline! I look forward to reading about your new birth!

  3. I love your post Beth. I know I am tired of keeping up with the Jones’. My older girls have been asking for a bigger house for years!
    I do pray for stillness and quiet so I can feel the light within.

    • Thanks, Caroline! Having young children does make it challenging to find that time for stillness and quiet. So important, though!

  4. Thanks for your realistic assessment of the inherent “messiness” of most creative processes. I also wanted to thank you (and Laurie) for your service at the Solstice event at Sevenoaks yesterday. Your dedication in the kitchen made for an enjoyable winter potluck supper for the big crowd. May the Love and Light of Christmas continue to manifest brightly in your life and within our Pathwork community.

    • You are welcome, John! And I’m so glad you enjoyed the day. I enjoyed myself too! Many Blessings to you for a wonderful Christmas!

  5. Thank you,lets go on studying

    • Yes, it’s a lifetime journey!


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